Why March?

I’ve seen a lot of people asking questions about the Women’s March on Washington, on Los Angeles, and on cities all over the world, including Antarctica.  Most of the questions are about the purpose of the march that took place on January 21st, 2017, just one day after the inauguration of President Donald Trump. Perhaps some of the confusion comes from people looking for one single message, or one single cause. If so, they’re search is much too narrow — there were many issues that were represented at the march. What started as a “Women’s March” became so much more.

FYI — I do not expect to get all of these right, and fully complete. So please, if any one of these issues is one you feel passionately about, I invite you to comment and provide more information (either side of the issue, provided you are debating and providing facts, not calling people names and linking clear misinformation). Alternative Facts will not be tolerated here.

Why did we march? Why was it a day after the Inauguration? Was it really about Donald Trump?

Yes, a large part of it was about Donald Trump. But it goes deeper than that. It’s about the rhetoric and agenda of the Republican congress as well. Yesterday was Day 1 of the new administration. What better day to let the new administration know that people are paying attention to what is going on, and what issues are important to us?

But nothing has happened yet. Why not give him a chance?

It isn’t about what HAS happened. It is about what has been promised, what has been suggested, and what is starting to happen.

If you were able to attend, you witnessed first-hand the myriad of issues that were addressed and important to all of the people in attendance. For those who weren’t able to attend, here are some of the issues:

Planned ParenthoodPlanned Parenthood – The Republican Congress has been trying to defund PP for years, giving the reason that they provide abortions, which they don’t want to pay for. The fact is that about 3% of Planned Parenthoods services are for abortion, and none of those services are paid for by Federal Funds, as it is already illegal. Defunding PP would leave women in poverty stricken neighborhoods with no critical care, as PP is often the only provider in the area that they have access to.

Women’s Right to Choose — This is an ongoing battle, and is certainly not a new issue. Mike Pence has promised to overturn Roe v Wade, with the expectation that they will be able to appoint new, more conservative judges to the Supreme Court. Women’s Rights includes the right for women to choose whether or not they want to have a baby. Let’s not get into the more difficult late-term abortion discussion here. This issue alone is quite sensitive, and can become the topic of a completely separate thread. There were many who noted that Pro-Life groups were not included.

My take on the exclusion of Pro-Life groups: The goal for the March was to focus on Women’s Rights (and ergo “Human Rights”). While I completely get that the Pro-Life movement believes that Human Rights includes the rights of the unborn, there was also an overall goal of a peaceful march. Pro-Life, or specifically, Anti-Abortion, is a very volatile issue, which would likely have resulted in a great deal of ugliness. The two groups are simply not compatible, as the Pro-Life movement’s primary goal ultimately requires control over what a woman does with her body. This is counter to what are uniquely considered “Women’s Rights.”

Black Lives Matter — they do. Yes, all lives matter, but if the Black Community experienced what the white community experiences, there wouldn’t be a need to talk about it. If you have a problem with the phrase, just add “, too” to the phrase. Maybe that will help. This issue focuses, in great part, on the fact that young black men are being shot and killed by police across the country in contrast with similar encounters with young white men that do not turn violent. It’s a problem; it needs to stop.

MATAThinking – there were a lot of “Make America Think Again” signs. Personally, I loved these. Kelly Ann Conway’s assertion this morning that Spicer, the White House Press Secretary simply presented “alternative facts,” underscores the need for Americans to stop every day and consider the information being presented to them. It’s frightening. Trump insists that his Inauguration was the “most attended in Presidential History,” when photographs and other facts easily prove otherwise. In case you’re not sure, “alternative facts” are lies.

MuslimsMuslims — Trump ran a very anti-Muslim campaign. Muslims are less safe around the country than they were before his campaign started.

Immigration — Trump ran a very anti-Immigration campaign. Immigrants are less safe around the country than they were before his campaign.

ACAHealthcare — Most people are not against changing the Affordable Care Act (Obamacare). They are concerned that the ACA will be repealed without being replaced, leaving a gap in coverage, which could easily result in loss of life for many people. We are reasonable — feel free to replace the ACA with something that will work better and be more affordable, but it needs to be available for all Americans. Congress recently took a “check” vote that indicated that most Republicans are comfortable with repealing the ACA and replacing it “later.” This would leave that gap in coverage that I am talking about. That would be irresponsible and disastrous.

WaterWater – there was a group representing the Dakota Pipeline demonstrators. This is not something that was started by Trump, but he is now inheriting the issue. and his business friends are on the side of the pipeline, not Native American rights, land rights, or protecting the environment.

 

EarthThe Environment – hours after the inauguration, the government website on Climate Change was taken down. It is not an issue they plan to address. This goes along with the “Thinking” issue. Science and Facts are no longer relevant to this administration. Instead, the more convenient “Alternative Facts” that support the administration’s agenda are preferred. Trump intends to increase our coal production, and disregard the science behind Climate Change, which could have serious ramifications for the world we leave to our children. (Trump is on record saying that Climate Change is a hoax perpetuated by the Chinese.)

EducationEducation – Trump’s choice for Secretary of Education has no background in Public Education whatsoever. Her primary qualification is that she is wealthy. I encourage you to look for the video of her hearing. She was really good at deflecting and not answering questions. Her response to many of the questions was “I think that is better left to the states.” That should make her job really easy – no National standards, and let the states worry about their own quality.

Russia – Lots of information lately about this.  I saw several signs reading “I can see Russia from here,” or “I can see Russia from the White House.”

PussyhatsSexual Assault – Anyone who has been paying attention to the campaign should know about Trump’s language, claims, and the accusations against him. A lot of people have indicated that they just don’t care, or that it doesn’t bother them. This issue is related to the hats worn by so many women in the crowd (most pink, mine was purple). See the pussyhatproject.com for more information on the hats. Add to this the recent sentences handed down to convicted rapists — months, 3 months, etc. A recent Police Commander in New York asserted that “date rape is not as bad a rape by a stranger.” A judge in a recent rape case asked a woman why she didn’t “just keep her legs closed.”

LGBTQ – American hase voted in a Vice President who believes in “conversion therapy.” This is a community that is always at risk, from simply walking down the street safely to which bathroom they may use.

Bullying – Trump’s dialog is classic bully talk. I grew up with it. Name calling, inciting others to go against each other, lying. His behavior has “normalized” bullying, essentially “making it okay.” It’s not.

Bad HombreTrump, himself — he needs to be held accountable or what he says, because what he says is also what he does. He’s being held accountable for “grabbing women by the pussy,” for “bad hombres” and “nasty women.” He’s being held accountable for his obsession with tweeting, his need for constant attention, and the fact that he seems to think that he is now “king,” his kids are “princes and princesses,” and that Congress is his “court.” He doesn’t seem to understand how the government works, the content of the Constitution, or the fact that he works for us now. He refused Intelligence briefings, has stated he doesn’t need them because he’s so damn smart, and has worked hard on discrediting and shutting down media. Many of us see in his behavior signs of dictatorship. The spread of misinformation, the attempt to control media messages so they are only positive about him are classic moves. These are things that you nip in the bud early – you don’t wait until our First Amendment has essentially disappeared. Because next to go will be our personal freedoms. Yes, it’s all in the Constitution, but our rights have to be enforced to make them meaningful.

Trump HotelThe photo at the left was taken at Trump International Hotel. As approached, the crowd began to boo, indicating disapproval of Trump’s refusal to divest himself from his businesses, making it possible for him to profit from his position as President. Many Americans believe this creates quite a conflict of interest. You can also see they are gesturing their disapproval.

Male SupportNot Just Women – I’d like to point out that there were a lot of men out there supporting women’s issues. Unless all men recognize the issues that women uniquely face, we’ll never move be able to get them resolved.

That’s what I’ve got for now. Please comment, and add anything I may have missed.

I’ll add more photos to the bottom of this post, but before I go, here is my favorite sign of the day. It really resonated with me, because I’m not really someone who usually gets politically involved. I’ve voted on both sides of the ticket throughout my life, depending upon who was running, and what issues were prevalent during that time,and how I felt. I have always believed in casting an educated vote, so I take the time to watch debates, read both sides of the issues, and talk to a lot of people about their opinions. But this time, it was something I felt very strongly about, and clearly a lot of people across the world did as well. If people in Antarctica thought it was important enough, then really, everyone should take a look around and consider what’s important, not only to them, but the people they love, and the people who are in the community in which they live.

Okay — Favorite Sign:

My Favorite

And the rest of the photos:

Counter Protesters
Counter Protesters
Germans Against Walls
Germans Against Walls. Seriously Valid!
We're with you
The sign says, “We’re With You!”
Grabbing
Accountability
Whole World is Watching
The Whole World is Watching. Powerful!
Consent
Consent
Reasons to March 2
Planned Parenthood; Message to Girls
Who You Calling Immigrant
Immigration
Enough Pussy
Accountability.
Feminism Back
Feminism
Fight Like a Girl
Fight Like A Girl
Reasons we march
Reasons we March
Fiction Becomes Reality
Another Favorite — Fiction Becomes Reality

Hope

Most of the people who know me are aware that when I was born, my parents learned that I had hip dysplasia with a few added complications. Wrapped up and lying down, you’d never know. If you removed the blankets and examined me from head to toe, you would have seen that one of my legs was shorter than the other, at an odd angle, and you would likely have been told to be gentle with my hip. Other than that, everything was in working order.

This was new to two young parents who already had two toddlers at home. Any parent knows that when you look at the child in your arms, you begin having dreams about what that child will be like, who, and what he or she will become. That’s really hard to do when you can’t even look beyond the next year and whether or not your child will sit, crawl, stand, or walk.

My parents have told me a story of two doctors.

The first doctor examined me, and came to my parents with his prognosis. He shrugged, and told them that modern medicine was making great strides and who knows, I might be fine. But, he shook his head, he didn’t know. There weren’t a lot of cases like mine. He couldn’t promise the leg would grow. He couldn’t promise I’d ever walk. He thought it was possible that my leg might have to be amputated.

Within a few days, my father was called in to speak with his CO. He was asked “What’s going on?”

“Well, Sir, my wife refuses to see that doctor again.”

“You’ve been assigned a doctor. You need to see the doctor you’ve been assigned.”

“I’m sorry, Sir. I have to back my wife on this one. We would like to be assigned a different doctor.”

We were assigned a new doctor.

Dr. Roeser examined me, and came to my parents with his prognosis. He looked at them matter-of-factly, and informed them that there weren’t a lot of cases like mine. He couldn’t tell at this point whether or not I would ever walk. But, he shrugged, modern medicine was making great strides, and he and his team would do everything they could for me, and it was entirely possible that I would be just fine.

Dr. Roeser would eventually become my Godfather.

As it turned out, modern medicine made greater strides than my first doctor could even imagine. I was blessed to have been seen and treated by some of the top doctors in the country, who donated their time and services for me and other children in need. My case was studied in medical schools. I have walked since I was a toddler.

Today, wrapped up in every day clothes, you’d never know. If “unwrapped,” evidence of surgeons’ skilled handiwork is visible in the ever-fading scars that line my lower limbs. But unless it’s been raining, you won’t even perceive a limp. Modern medicine has been pretty amazing.

The primary difference between the two doctors? Both were most assuredly skilled. But one – one gave my parents HOPE. That was enough. That was all they needed. They took it from there. If there is anything I have learned in my life, it is the power of HOPE.

It Never Gets Old

Today we went to CostCo to get the tires rotated on our 11 year-old Honda Pilot. As we walked in, I noticed a red bench for customers to sit on while they wait. It was hot outside, and no one was at the front desk yet, so I sat down and scooted back so that I could sit up properly. Ed looked over at me and saw that I was swinging my legs as I sat, since my feet didn’t touch the floor. He shook his head and chuckled.

“It never gets old, does it?” I asked.

“Nope!” came the response.

Fast forward 30 minutes. This time, we’re inside CostCo, shopping while we wait for our car. We’re not in a hurry, so we’ve been exploring every aisle, checking out what’s new, and what’s cool. Finally, we get to Ed’s favorite section – the refrigerated fruit and vegetable room. Usually we go in for lettuce, cucumbers, and the like. But, our garden is starting to produce, so he’s mainly there for the cool air. I’m there to see if there’s anything I want.

He spied the tower of blueberries. Although we went berry-picking yesterday, there were no fresh blueberries to be had in the fields. Blueberries have become a favorite in our household; we eat them by the handful as though they are candy, especially when we’ve picked our own.

“Hey, go check out the blueberries,” he suggested, nodding his head in the direction of the display.

I looked over and observed the tower. Sure, I could check them out… on my tiptoes. The boxes were piled high, to the point that if I walked over and stood next to the display, my nose would just reach the top box so that I could peer over the top and see the blueberry containers. I raised my eyebrows in response, and the expression on my face communicated a single, unspoken word. “Seriously?”

Once again, he shook his head, and chuckled as he walked over to the blueberry display and easily began picking through the containers, reaching deliberately for one in the back that I would never have been able to see or touch.

“Never gets old, does it?” I asked again. This time, he just laughed.

In August, we will celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary. Apparently, it never does get old. At least I have kept him amused.



Short Girl Problems, from BuzzFeed Yellow on YouTube

Moving, Part IV: PODs

PODs are giant storage containers that are delivered to your doorstep so that you can load them, and then taken away to the POD Storage Facility until you need your stuff back. They’ll also ship your container across country, if that’s where you’re moving.  In our case, we were just downsizing and staying local.  Because we had a two-week gap between our move-out and move-in dates, this was the perfect solution for our situation.

Here’s how it works:

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Moving, Part III: Packing

Packing

Before we even knew where we were going, and how we would be getting there, we started packing. Basically, as soon as the house sold, we started packing.  It’s important to get a head start on this, because the time can sneak up on you, and you don’t want to end up with movers in the house, and half the house unpacked.

We got moving supplies from Home Depot and Osh. We were later told by the movers that we saved a lot of money this way, as the moving companies will charge much more for the supplies.  We bought:

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Moving, Part II: Purging

Before we could pack, we needed to purge. I’m tempted to suggest that people should move every five years or so just to make sure they purge. By “purge,” I mean “go through all of your stuff and throw or give away what you don’t need or want anymore.”  After all, what is the use of packing and transporting stuff you don’t need?  Especially if it costs you money to do so!  We started the purging process before the house went on the market.  Not only did it reduce the stress of packing, it did a lot to help the house show and sell better.

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Moving: Overview

Recently, we sold our house (yay!). With a 30-day escrow (yikes!). Without having a home to move into (ouch!).

Normally, there would be a contingency placed on the sale that could allow us to stay in the house until we had somewhere else to go. In our case, we had plans to move into a rental home instead of buying a new one, which is (usually) easier to manage than the home buying process. With a 30-day escrow, the time for the buyer to commit is shorter, but it also means that there is a small window of time between the commit date and closing date. This didn’t give us a lot of time to find a home that was move-in ready. As soon as the commit date passed, there was a flurry of activity to look at homes, choose one, put in the application, provide the deposit, and sign the paperwork. This was all done in a matter of days, but the home that we found would not be available two weeks after the sale of our house closed.

Here are some of things that we have done to help our move go smoothly:

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Summer Solstice – a Time for Healing

 

June 20th, was officially the Summer Solstice for 2012. Typically, the Summer Solstice, the one day when the sun reaches her highest point in the sky and shows her beautiful self for longer than any other day of the year, occurs on June 21st, but I guess 2012 was just different.

I woke up slowly quite early in the morning today, to involuntary yoga. It was about 4:30 a.m., and the morning light was starting to show through my bedroom window. There was a bit of a chill from the open window, but I was warm, snuggled under the covers, firmly pressed back to back with my husband, the Human Furnace. Every once in a while, I would poke an arm or leg out from under the blanket and allow the cool air to soak in, until I felt the chill enough to retreat again to the comfort of my heated sanctuary.

I yawned. Not a typical yawn, but one that was obviously trying to capture as much oxygen as possible; the kind of yawn that requires a series of long gasps, closes your ears, and makes you worry that your jaw will pop. Initially, quite unsatisfying. It was followed by another of the same type. This time I moved my body a little in order to make room for the head stretch that was necessary to allow the yawn to run its course; and I heard, more than felt, my jaw pop. More than satisfying; it was good to feel my lungs expand; I’d been plagued with a “reactive airway” and cough for weeks, which required the occasional use of an inhaler.

One yawn was followed quickly by another, and I spent a few minutes indulging my body’s need for oxygen. At the same time, I wondered if all the yawning could lead to hyperventilating; would it go on all day? Could it become a problem? As I was considering the need to change my schedule for the day, the yawning subsided, but was replaced by a round of lung clearing coughs. These were different from the coughing caused by my reactive airway. These coughs felt as though they came from the dark recesses of my lungs, as though someone were sweeping the dust out of them and allowing more room for the good air. Good coughs.

The coughs settled, and I thought I would drift back to sleep. But apparently I wasn’t finished yet. My arm decided it needed to stretch, so I moved it. I made a great arc from my hip, to an invisible point well above my head, back down and around to my back as far as the muscles and joints would take me. I arched my back to get more out of the stretch, and I could feel and hear my spine, shoulder, and wrist bones crack. After I folded my arm back under the covers, my neck decided it needed to stretch, then my hip, down to my ankle.

“You need to stop moving,” my husband’s deep morning voice whispered in my ear. My movements had woken him up. I apologized, but didn’t stop moving. For a while there, I would have sworn that upon rising, I would measure the 5’7″ that I was originally supposed to be. Not likely.

The oxygen from all the yawning and stretching finally made it to my brain. I opened my eyes, clearheaded, and gazed around the bright room, illuminated by the rising sun. I felt better than I had in a long time.

It was the third day after the loss of my job. I’d been unhappy for too long. Time for a change, some healing, and perhaps a rebirth of sorts. I felt a bit like a newborn deer, stretching and untangling my limbs, but now ready to meet the world and see what it has in store for me.

Ooh — one more really… good… stretch. Ahhhhh, yes!

 

Teaching Anxiety Dream – a Memoir

Have You Ever Taught in Your Pajamas?

I’m on the second floor of what appears to be an old elementary or high school. An old fashioned, yellow pine teacher’s desk is in the front of the classroom, covered with the standard teacher paraphernalia – blotter, pencil holder, a stack of papers waiting to be graded. About 25 people are in the room, mostly milling about or sitting on a fuzzy blue rug just inside the doorway, talking and waiting. My boss is standing off to the side, looking at me expectantly. I see a blonde young man standing near the doorway. His phone rings with an obnoxiously loud rock song.

Suddenly, I realize that I am there to teach a class. I also realize that although I was responsible for developing the original material, it has been updated several times, and I haven’t reviewed it. There are no computers on the desks, which I now realize are the college-style arm desks (all left-handed), and there are no manuals laid out and ready to go. Suddenly, I notice that although I remember standing at my dressing table perfecting my hair and makeup, I am standing in the room in my pajamas – a short, tie-dyed frock that could pass for a summer dress. I have no idea if I have any shoes on, and I’m not in the mood to look. My boss is still waiting, but doesn’t seem to notice that I’m not properly dressed. The young man’s phone rings again, but he seems disinclined to answer it, so the loud rock song plays on.

Blink, and I’m in the back of the classroom with one of my students. She has been a training coordinator for several years, and could probably teach the class in her sleep. I know this, yet I also know that I am supposed to teach her the materials. We are methodically rummaging through the materials closet. The closet is larger than the classroom, brightly lit, with high shelves filled to the ceiling with training materials. This room is well organized, but try as we might, we cannot find any training manuals for the class I am supposed to teach.

Back in the classroom, some of the students have taken their seats. Somehow both computer and training manuals have materialized, but the room is still abuzz with chatting. As I stand in the front of the room preparing to begin the class, still in my pajamas, wondering if I can run home at break to change my clothes, the young man’s phone rings one more time.

“OUT!” I shout at him, pointing, straight-armed, at the door. He looks at me, bewildered, and shrugs, tossing his blonde locks at me as he exits the room. He is followed by his yellow Labrador.

 

Just Being Nice Can Make Someone’s Day

A Trip to the Bank Ends in a Touching Experience

I went to the bank to open a new account for my Avon business. As I walked into the bank, the first representative who I saw was on the telephone and not looking very happy at all. His voice was low and he was trying to keep his voice quiet as he expressed his frustration to the person on the other end of the phone. I moved on. At the next desk, a woman was speaking loudly into the telephone; she appeared to be with another customer. She was also not very happy.

As I looked around, I didn’t see a place where I could sign in and wait my turn, so I finally walked all the way to the back of the bank and asked the first non-busy person I could find for help. She smiled, got up and walked me all the way back to the first desk with the gentleman still on the phone, still frustrated. They made eye contact, there was a quiet hand signal, and I heard him tell his caller that he would have to call him back. He hung up the phone, took a deep breath, and turned to greet me.

I could tell that his nerves were on edge, and he was trying to rapidly pull himself together so that he could be of help to me. “I’m so sorry,” he said. “That’s okay,” I answered, “it happens. I can tell you were frustrated. Would you like me to give you a minute?” “No,” he smiled, turning his full attention to me, “I can tell you are a nice person, and I’m really glad you sat down here. We’re going to have a very different experience than the one I just left.” I looked at his name tag — JOSH, it said, in bold letters.

As we began to speak, the woman on the other side of the partition began to speak louder. Josh started to speak, and then stopped to wait for a pause. As he began again, the volume on the other side rose again. He stood up and quietly looked over the partition. The raised voice continued, and Josh sighed and sat down again. He looked at me apologetically and said, “she just finished yelling at me, too.” “It sounds like you’re really have a bad day,” I said, feeling very sympathetic. “I really hope it gets better!”

I explained what I was looking for, and we discussed a few different options. After agreeing on a course of action, he mentioned that he would also give me two movie tickets, and recommended the latest “Horton Hears a Who” movie, which he had recently seen. He left me to sign several checks while he checked some paperwork. When he returned, he entered my information, creating my account, and was very careful to add “Avon Acct” so that I could distinguish this new one from my regular account. He asked me what products I sold, and I mentioned that Avon sells a variety of products, including skin care, makeup, jewelry, and toys and other items for children. He suggested that I give him a book, as he was married, and his wife may want a few things.

When I mentioned that the latest catalog had several Mother’s Day gift ideas, he was quiet for a minute. He smiled and shared that he had recently lost his grandmother, and their Mother’s Day tradition was to go out to a nice restaurant together. He was going to miss it this year. We talked a bit more, and I learned that he had a small daughter with Cerebral Palsy; I could see how much he loves her.

“You’re a really nice person,” he said again. “I can’t tell you how glad I am that you sat here at my desk after that last phone call.”

He got up to make sure that my checks were deposited correctly. In the meantime, I returned to my car to pick up the brochure I had promised. But I also wanted to do something special for Josh to help him through his day. So I picked up one of the boxes in my Avon bag and brought it in with me.

When Josh came back with my receipt, I gave him two brochures — one to keep and one to give away, as well as a few business cards. “More importantly,” I said, “I really want to give you something, because I think we really made a connection.” He agreed. I handed him the bracelet — blue, with a small infinity symbol on it. Just a small trinket, really. “This is Avon’s Women’s Empowerment bracelet. It’s a fundraising item, which you can read about on this small card. But I want you to wear it, and think about your grandmother, your wife, and your little girl whenever you look at it. And when you call the previous customer back, as you invariably will have to, just touch the bracelet when you begin to get frustrated, and know that it will all get better.”

My voice caught when I mentioned his loved ones, and I could see that he was touched, too. He asked if he could give me a hug, and told me again how glad he was that we had met.

“God Bless You,” he said quietly as I got up to leave. I knew he already had.